New tool just dropped
Thankfully, I feel the tools that make sense to add to my toolbox are coming more slowly these days.
It needs to make sense and build on top of the existing structures that already make sense to me.
Maybe it’s mostly a distilling phase I’m in right now.
But I heard this on a very controversially-titled podcast involving the words Queer Jesus (the explanation said that Jesus was the ultimate non-binary - of this world and not, unconditionally loving, capable of loving all despite any of their qualities or actions), where a somatic teacher being interviewed ran the hostesses through
pendulation.
This stacks as well onto my current strategies as getting a new drill bit for a tool kit. Natural fit, easy, obvious, and clicks into place.
Say you come across something that bothers you - God forbid.
Check in with what “bothering you” feels like, if you have enough bandwith left after the righteousness fills you. Believe me, I’m sympathetic.
Find where it is in your body.
Describe its texture to yourself, the movement, maybe the vision (you can practice this ability in just 5 minutes with the free PDF intro to shamanic meditation I made) and notice the words that have POPPED up into your psychic energy space you didn’t put there yourself.
This takes only a moment when you’re practiced at having some distance from the turmoil.
Maybe - and often - that moment of attention appeases the internal beast and you can go back to being present and attentive to the tasks (or people) at hand, making a choice that you are still happy about later about what your next move is.
But if it doesn’t —
Now find where it isn’t.
Notice where it is in your body you don’t have a problem with what’s happening.
Chances are this is most of your body. The triggered area is usually pretty concentrated, making it super easy to find.
I usually have some part pop up as really obviously unbothered by the situation going on. Like my feet, my back, or my butt. Those areas feel calm.
And go back and forth.
If I devote a moment to feeling that, then go back to the triggered or tense and bothered area for a moment, then back, then back again — the feeling tends to do…something. Try it.
It settles.
Maybe I could compare it (I’m still new to this addition) to a dog watching another dog for guidance.
Or neurological training tactics involving mirrors like how you can restore function to a limb by placing mirrors and tricking the mind into seeing the healthy limb as if it’s the nonfunctioning one.
Or maybe it’s just coregulating with yourself in a less forced way than it takes TRYING to do it. It’s like wait — what part of me is already regulated right now, not freaking out? It’s not all of me that’s freaking out. It’s just a part.
Your assignment
Play with this the next time you’re bothered by something that doesn’t require you to immediately move your hand off the flame so to speak. When you have the space to move back and forth. Maybe like when your friend or partner says something you totally fucking knew they were going to say and always pisses you off but really is quite harmless and you want to stop being a dick to them about it.
You could just think about something that pisses you off right now to experiment with it.
Lemme know how it goes. Comment below or hit reply in your inbox. Thanks!
2024 Challenge
Meditate for a full hour.
Have you ever done this?
Repeatedly in my group training sessions people have been intrigued when I tell them it is utterly predictable that their experience will change into a peaceful drift at around the 40-42 minute mark. It happens to everyone. Things just change.
Does sitting for an hour sound impossible right now?
Start with 5 minutes.
And unlock some of your inner shaman while you’re in the process.
Every uber-successful person on those podcasts you like meditates. Why don’t you learn this year.