Quick German New Medicine Live Story

"Allergy" symptoms fade with discovery

Just a refresher on the existence of GNM and how you could look up literally any physical symptoms you’re having here: https://learninggnm.com/SBS/documents/sbs_index.html

I was puttering around later than normal at work today, partly worrying about Maggie who had had a poop accident several hours before I could get home to her.

For a number of reasons I was a bit extra-stressed about doing everything right.

I had just had a fight w my immediate manager a couple of days ago.

I wanted to get everything right at work but it seemed like every day there was a new task or reminder about something added onto the work load and I just couldn’t get it done in time. (Cue mild self-devaluation, this is important)

I finally told myself it was time to go home.

Then I got home and felt a strong need to do more at home than I was doing and felt bad about not doing more, and also thought about wanting to do more as a friend to someone than I’ve been doing. Again, notice the negative self-talk slant here.

I was able to notice what I was doing again, note the feeling of overwhelm and corresponding desperation to do something impossible that would never feel like enough/perfectionism, and sit myself down in the bathroom to pee and slow down forcibly, doing a mild meditation to let myself witness the thoughts and feelings and let them unwind. I slipped into a more parasympathetic state here.

A few minutes later I noticed hives starting on me/in me. Mild, itchy hives are something that happen to me once a year, sometimes less, sometimes more but not much more. I’ve always shrugged about it and never been able to find something I could pinpoint as a trigger - was it pollen? Was it something I ate? Was it stress?

Ah, but that’s not specific enough. What kind of stress?

This time, as I noted the increasing feelings which historically have had me turn to remedies for comfort I discovered as a child - cold water, towels wrapped around me, or in recent years sitting with the feeling and not making up any stories or panicking, I began wildly tracking what had just happened through the lens of German New Medicine (GNM).

I was just stressed (in a conflict), dropped out of stress (end of conflict?), symptom. This is enough to drive me mad with curiosity for GNM.

GNM knows that everything starts in the psyche, through our interpretation of events, with understandable biological consequences.

I used that site above to look up hives and came to the skin category.

Hives or rashes on the inner portions of the body indicate wanting to be close to something but unable to be. A separation conflict where you did not want to be separated from something but you were. Rashes on the outer portions of the body would indicate a separation conflict but to the effect of wanting separation, perhaps being unable to get away from unwanted touch.

My mind skimmed over every memory I could come up with around wanting to be around and connected to people/mom/dad/whatever.

Within 5-10 minutes I could feel the hives fading.

After texting a few friends who are into this shit and realizing a few things through my summaries to them, I looked up lymph nodes because most of the hives were centered around those areas with high lymph node concentrations.

Even more on track! The biological conflict around lymph nodes is a moderate self-devaluation conflict or loss of self-worth! Which is exactly what I was doing to myself with my negative self-talk around not being able to do enough to satisfy me.

There’s even descriptions for each lymph node area -

Cervical nodes located in the neck: intellectual self-devaluation conflict

Axillary nodes located in the armpits: relationship self-devaluation conflict

Abdominal nodes located in the lower abdomen: self-devaluation conflicts associated with the abdominal area, brought on, for example, by a cancer diagnosis (stomach cancer, colon cancer, liver cancer, pancreas cancer)

Inguinal nodes located in the groin at the bend of the hip: “unable to endure a situation” or a sexual self-devaluation conflict

Popliteal Nodes located near the knees: physical performance conflict

I had some in all these places lol.

But I noticed them in my armpits first. And as I read this the rest of my symptoms continued to fade -

Women develop a lymphoma in the axillary nodes when, for instance, a nest-worry conflict is coupled with guilt (“I failed as a mother”, “I failed as a partner”). A breast cancer diagnosis and the image of an amputated breast can provoke a self-devaluation conflict involving the axillary gland close to the affected breast. This is why lymphoma is one of the most frequent cancers following breast cancer. It has nothing to do with a “metastasizing” process, as argued.

I don’t have a lymphoma but the nest-worry coupled with guilt and the axillary (armpit) nodes associated with it was EXACTLY what I was doing. The perception of failing as a source of help to my workplace was compounded when I got home with a feeling of failing as a roommate who couldn’t do things perfectly enough and wanted to take on more than I could chew.

Bam. Hives once I dropped out of the active stress and began to unwind. You’re too busy for symptoms when you’re in stress. GNM explains that what we call sickness and symptoms are usually healing phases that occur when you finally drop out of the conflict that you’re in.

Look, I still barely understand this stuff, but I did get a live picture tonight of how just looking over the knowledge and chains of connection can help. There’s a whole podcast just about stories like this. Leave a comment if you want me to link it so I know somebody read this far and gives a shit. Wait - am I self-devaluing again?

People ARE reading! I’ll give them the damn link as an act of faith.

I’ll go use some of the other tools in my psyche toolbox to process the rest of this more fully now, after some sleep.

And I’m off to contemplate why I feel hives in my ears and whether there are things I didn’t want to hear or things I do want to hear but did not. It’s the interior of the ear so I’m thinking want to but didn’t. And it’s both ears so that means it’s not just a partner or just a mother-related thing. I’m just guessing that’s what GNM would say and it’s fascinating to think about.