Self-Shaman-ing
Enlisting help in order to take more responsibility for my life is different than enlisting help so someone else can save me.
I met my guru two weeks ago!
“Be Your Own Damn Guru” - says his books and courses.
I’ve been thinking about having a session with and/or meeting Shaman Durek for years! Since I got his book Spirit Hacking and definitely since breaking down sobbing on a Live Instagram with him…
(He calmly coached me into rising above the experience)
And a couple of weeks ago, I did it. I met him at an in-person event about LOVE in LA at the Ra Ma yoga and spiritual center.
What I came away with was….
I can learn from God anything I could learn from Shaman Durek.
I didn’t have any lightning bolts come out of me, or shamanic clearings, or any of the billions of divine possibilities that I’m certain an actual session focused on me and not a group teaching would have, for $1500. (The group teaching was much less btw.)
I got my hug.
I interacted and felt and heard evidence that I’m communicating more clearly with spirit energy than most of the people present, that I’m dicking myself over less and fooling myself ever so slightly less than a lot of other people at least.
I expected a whirlpool of energy and a desire to go farther into teachings with him.
What I got was a deeper sense of my own personal power, communication, and that I’m doing all right.
While that may be hard to believe to some of my friends I’ve -existential-crisis’d- with the past couple weeks, it was the lesson I took.
I can learn from God anything I could learn from Shaman Durek.
He’s right - you are your own guru.
Ultimately, I’m my own guru. Attempts to give my power and responsibility away will backfire.
Enlisting help in order to take more responsibility for my life is different than enlisting help so someone else can save me. (I liked this line when I wrote it so I’m doubling it).
I feel there is a sense that only we know around where we are shirking or pushing off responsibility. Blaming others, or waiting and hoping for others to do it for us.
People that work too hard will blame work for being tired.
People that work too little will blame the world for not giving them what they want.
Only you know where you stand on that spectrum and it’s probably the one that’s more uncomfortable to consider.
Here’s what I recommend for you to do in these moments:
Simply feel. Ask yourself, “What are the sensations of…[not wanting to take responsibility/taking responsibility/doing this/doing that/doing the other thing]?”
Fully accept them moving through your body, and notice how it becomes easier to take responsibility for the things your mind thought would be much much scarier than they are.
And a reminder to all of us that there is an option to JUST do it scared.
More on this internal divide in my latest podcast episode you can listen to here.